boobs
Recently, I had a conversation about breasts with a boy.
Boobs are weird. I tell him.
And then I got “science bombed” by this.
Morris’ hypothesis is that the breast is a purely erotic affectation–a piquing notion. Most creatures in the animal kingdom tend to have the most success mating in a “male aft” sexual position because of the placement of the genitalia. In quadrupeds such as dogs and cats, all the sexual equipment is right out in plain view framed by large, rounded buttocks. Humans and their unique propensity to stand and walk erect put an end to that straight away. Changes to the pelvic region that allowed for all this walking about also causes a “face to face” mating position to have a higher effectiveness among bipeds. Morris’ contention is that it was more practical for the female to evolve an analog to the buttocks on her front than it was to re-wire the male instinct to desire an alternate sex pose. The breasts took on the roll of buttocks being the frameset of sexuality.
I’m not as worried about this as you think. I just find it odd that I have buttocks on my front. And now, sometimes I stare at them and have these contemplative moments.
Why such a big deal over lumpy fat? Well, strategically placed lumpy fat, but nonetheless. Honestly, they’re just boobs. A few weeks ago this photo was taken by my friend Nomi in San Francisco.
Now, what’s funny about this picture is that the original shows no actual nipple. But, I suppose it risky enough for the black mark of censorship. If I were in Europe, this would be on a TV guide … with me completely topless.
Why are Europeans so much less offended by cleave? No one cares on the beaches of the Mediterranean if you let your mammary glands dangle in the Southern French sun. Except here’s the deal… the boobs you want to see , you never get to. What I’ve seen all the years of my visits to European beaches were 70 year old leathery boobs spread out like a saddle atop the torso of one seriously ugly Danish woman.
So why the big deal in Sweden? I’m guessing the Northern Europeans take things a little more serioiusly.
All I can say is, at least it’s not celebrity crotch. That’s a pandemic in the states.
